9 negotiation tips for people who hate negotiating by Sara Lindberg on May 3, 2018, 5:08 PM Advertisement
 - Negotiation is not the same thing as conflict— you have to be willing to compromise and/or say no if you don’t like the offer.
- Though it's widely hated, being able to negotiate is a skill you need if you want to get ahead in your career.
- Being optimistic, prepared, and using active listening can boost your changes of success.
When I left the comfort of a steady paycheck to pursue full-time freelance work, I had no idea how difficult negotiating in the work world was going to be. For the prior 20 years, I’d lived in the land of education. I worked in a system that pays a set amount of money based on two criteria: the number of years you’ve been working, and the amount of education you have. As a result, I was poorly prepared for the world of freelance, where being successful requires you to be a master negotiator — something I’ve always hated doing. I had to quickly get past the idea that negotiation equals conflict, and instead embrace the fact that it’s about communicating your needs to get what you deserve. Here are some expert tips for negotiating, even for those who loathe the idea of it: SEE ALSO: How much money to ask for in a salary negotiation 1. Negotiating is separate from conflict  If you think negotiating with another person feels like conflict, you’re not alone. In fact, it’s one of the main reasons people avoid negotiations. “People often see negotiations as win-lose, and they fear the other side will win and they will lose,” Marianne Eby, a negotiation expert and CEO of Watershed Associates, told Business Insider. “But negotiating done well can be a win-win,” Eby said. All it really takes is “talking with a goal in mind.” She said that if you shift your idea of negotiating from conflict to conversation, you’ll realize there are more opportunities to develop solutions than reasons to be afraid.
2. Be optimistic  If you go into a negotiation doubting your worth, there’s a good chance you’re not going to get what you ask for. That’s why it’s important to be optimistic. “Start from a positive posture, believe that you are going to succeed, and operate accordingly,” Joy Altimare, career expert and chief engagement and brand officer at EHE, told Business Insider.
3. Show up prepared  Preparing for a negotiation is no different than the work you would do for any other important meeting. “Prepare in advance for a challenging conversation so that you can anticipate the questions and navigate based on the facts — not emotion,” Altimare said. “Do some homework about what is possible in this situation, and don’t second-guess yourself before you get your ask out of your mouth,” Eby said.
See the rest of the story at Business Insider
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